I've blogged about bugs before. It's a topic worth revisiting. Because they just keep coming back.
Forget A Bug's Life. Forget the gentle, heroic ant in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. (How old am I?) Pay no attention to that catchy little song The Ants Go Marching.
Ants are evil.
They launched a full assault on the house today.
It's the rainy season, and for some odd reason the ants all want to come inside. They're not even after the food. If they find food, they eat it, but mostly they were just wandering around today making my life miserable. There were hundreds of them swarming around the front door, and from there they split off into a dozen strategic directions. They ambled across the marble floor in the living room, where our baby daughter spends a great deal of time crawling around. They surged through a crack in the kitchen window and set about exploring the sinks, countertops, walls, and cupboards. They had even built a network of roads where the walls meet the ceiling, with steady traffic traversing THE ENTIRE CIRCUMFERENCE OF THE--wait, can a rectangular room have a circumference? Sorry--THE ENTIRE PERIMETER OF THE KITCHEN.
I had no choice but to bring out the big guns: Baygon (the Philippines equivalent of Raid) and Lysol.
The battle is over, but the war will continue.
I also have a bone to pick with those loveable rodents of Ratatouille. Just after battling the ants I walked outside to see an enormously obese rat waddle past.
Let's just hope he doesn't have a friend named Remy.
Showing posts with label bugs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bugs. Show all posts
Monday, October 1, 2007
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Stinky Old Crackroach
The First-Born killed a cockroach with his shoe today, then swept it up with a broom and flushed it. Brave, brave boy. I see one of those things rush past me and I head for high ground. Younger Son named it the Stinky Old Crackroach.
Filipinos are fearless when it comes to cockroaches. I watched our helper whip off her shoe and nail one from six feet away as it surged across the floor. Then she calmly retrieved her shoe, picked the bug up by its hideously long antennae and took it out with the rest of the trash. Brave, brave Lucy.
If the cockroaches are unnerving, the ubiquitous mosquitoes are pure evil. Trap one (or more) in your room at night and you wake up the next morning feeling woozy from the blood loss. I've lain in bed, staring into the darkness, listening to them whine and hum in my ear as they close in for the kill. I've leapt from the bed, wild-eyed, pillow swinging, fearing for my sanity. I even trapped one under the covers once and promptly inhaled it. My very own Fear Factor moment.
And the ants. Oh, those resourceful little devils. Leave one crumb, one speck of food lying about and they organize a scouting party and send in the troops. They're crafty, those ants. They find the most twisty, illogical, roundabout paths to food--e.g., through the crack beneath the window, down the wall, across the counter top, up and across another wall, over the doorframe, down the wall, and into the sink to retrieve the tiny spot of syrup that didn't get washed down the drain. The way our kids cart snacks from room to room, I'm surprised the ants aren't morbidly obese.
I am not, not, not a bug person. I know it could be worse. Luckily we have little geckos that roam the house and supposedly help keep the bug population under control. But I'm not so sure they're doing their job. I once poured myself a bowl of Cheerios and out of the bag came a gecko, very much alive and probably more startled then I was. So the lizards are getting fat off our pantry stores, the ants and cockroaches are getting fat from stray crumbs, and the mosquitoes are getting fat off our cholesterol-clogged, American blood. The bright side? At least they'll be easier to catch.
Be good.
Filipinos are fearless when it comes to cockroaches. I watched our helper whip off her shoe and nail one from six feet away as it surged across the floor. Then she calmly retrieved her shoe, picked the bug up by its hideously long antennae and took it out with the rest of the trash. Brave, brave Lucy.
If the cockroaches are unnerving, the ubiquitous mosquitoes are pure evil. Trap one (or more) in your room at night and you wake up the next morning feeling woozy from the blood loss. I've lain in bed, staring into the darkness, listening to them whine and hum in my ear as they close in for the kill. I've leapt from the bed, wild-eyed, pillow swinging, fearing for my sanity. I even trapped one under the covers once and promptly inhaled it. My very own Fear Factor moment.
And the ants. Oh, those resourceful little devils. Leave one crumb, one speck of food lying about and they organize a scouting party and send in the troops. They're crafty, those ants. They find the most twisty, illogical, roundabout paths to food--e.g., through the crack beneath the window, down the wall, across the counter top, up and across another wall, over the doorframe, down the wall, and into the sink to retrieve the tiny spot of syrup that didn't get washed down the drain. The way our kids cart snacks from room to room, I'm surprised the ants aren't morbidly obese.
I am not, not, not a bug person. I know it could be worse. Luckily we have little geckos that roam the house and supposedly help keep the bug population under control. But I'm not so sure they're doing their job. I once poured myself a bowl of Cheerios and out of the bag came a gecko, very much alive and probably more startled then I was. So the lizards are getting fat off our pantry stores, the ants and cockroaches are getting fat from stray crumbs, and the mosquitoes are getting fat off our cholesterol-clogged, American blood. The bright side? At least they'll be easier to catch.
Be good.
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